The first thing you were probably wondering when you visited the site was what the hell is a Gorjus Doc???
There are two assumptions you probably made about me from the name Gorjus Doc.
1) I prefer a more urban/ "ghetto" vernacular.
2) I think very highly of my self.
While these assumptions are some what accurate there is more to the nick name than the eyes can see. It dates all the way back to my converse, flat twists, and gel pens days back in middle school.
Back then you weren't cool unless you had air forces, Rocawear jackets, and Pepe jeans. So given my poor parents from Jamaica, I by default wasn't pretty luke warm. But I had a few things going for me, I was smart and I could draw so I used that to my advantage to make friends.
This was the era when everyone gave themselves nicknames, Princess, Dime Piece, Shorty, Cutie all spelled incorrectly and in bubbly letters. I was the master of bubble letters and when we had a free period at school, I would sketch all these creative names on the board with chalk. So by default, I had to come up with my own name, one that was worthy of making it's way to the chalk board, and thus the name Gorjus was born.
Despite the nickname I gave myself, I didn't feel Gorjus. I had kinky hair, chocolate skin, and buck teeth with a gap and I grew breasts and hips before I know what to do with them. It took random cars beeping the horn at me as I skipped to the bodega to realize I had grown women body parts. I always wished I could be petite and slim like my friends, or have long silky curly hair and fair skin like my Hispanic friends, or light color eyes like my mixed friends. Or better yet, I wanted to look like the glamorous video models in the music videos. Not to mention I would get picked on for being one of few Caribbean Americans in my school, and it didn't help that my mom would roll up to the playground to pick me up after school blasting reggae tunes
with a Jamaican flag hanging from the rear view mirror.
It took me a long time to embrace my culture, the skin I was in, the hair growing on my head, and the gap I still have to this day. It took me a long time to actually feel like the Gorjus I had doodled all over my notebooks. I had to fake it till I made it. I had to reprogram the way I think and the things I watched, the things I believed and challenge what I was taught by the media. This also required being introspective, and looking inside my self for what what Gorjus, not just on the OUTSIDE.
And through this self exploration, I BECAME Gorjus, and once I started med school, the Doc part followed.